benevolent insantiy

My computer at home is broken which has thrown a wrench into my daily routine. I don’t have a stereo or cable. Just a crappy clock radio that doesn’t play very well; and a record player, but only a handful of records that I may decide to break anyway for personal reasons.  I use my computer to stream NPR, UGLY BETTY, and to scoot along the World Wide Web. Last week, before I got sick and before I went on my vacation, I had been thinking about the fact that I spend too much time in front of the computer. Fartin’ around checking blogs, emails, and ebay. And why?   I tried to impose some guidelines and time limits on my computer usage,  then FATE took it one step further and shut the whole operation down. The timing was okay because I was flying out the next morning, anyway. Now that I’m home, though, I realize that my main source of frustration stems from the fact that I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO FIX A COMPUTER AND I AM ALL ALONE STARING AT THE STUPID MACHINE. 

Technology has been and is a great tool for staying connected. The telephone to hear someone’s voice from far away. Email to catch someone up or share a funny story. Facebook. . . well, I haven’t crossed that line, yet, so I’m not too sure of it’s purpose. And then there’s texting. Just two years ago I didn’t know how to send or receive a text. I then came to rely on it for directing a friend to the booth we were sitting in at a bar. Or passing along information when a phone call can’t happen. Now, I’ve taken it to places I thought I would never go. And I’m not proud of it. Sometimes the instant gratification is so intoxicating that it becomes addictive. And you forget (I forgot) that something is being lost.  Texting is possible because we have opposable thumbs. And those thumbs separate MAN from ANIMAL. But animals work on instinct, scent, sight, sound, touch. There is truth in all that. TEXTING + IMAGINATION = torture in many guises. I am now imposing a moratorium on texting. For myself. And I have an appointment this evening with a computer helpline service. I will fix my stupid computer ALL BY MYSELF (with the help of whoever has the misfortune of answering my call!)


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